A Modern Priest Looks At His Outdated Church, James Kavanaugh

A Modern Priest Looks at His Outdated Church, Father James Kavanaugh, 1967.

At first glance, this nonfiction work may seem out of place on my reading list seeing as it is about the Catholic Church and was written in the late 60’s. I picked it up though because Kavanaugh is the author of the poetry collection There Are Men Too Gentle to Live Among Wolves which features prominently in my novel-in-progress and I was interested in his antecedent thoughts leading up to the poems. Turns out this is a great read. Early in the book Kavanaugh writes that the book stands as a protest to the suffering he and his Church have caused in the name of protecting ‘arrogant and ignorant’ absolutes, while ignoring the humanity and circumstances within each person. I also read it as a sort of apology to all those he served poorly by not listening to his heart as they shared their problems and concerns with him.

Though the book is dated I found the protest and the ideas within relevant to contemporary society. It really can be seen as an indictment against any monolithic organization that prioritizes its own survival and progress over the welfare of the people who are part of that organization. Obviously this is true of most organized religions, but also true of both political parties in the US, especially Trump and his oligarchic organization. Kavanaugh, however, only speaks of the Catholic Church, never straying into politics. It is simply my interpretation that the suffering he speaks of, the killing of the hearts, minds, and souls of the populace, exists today throughout the USA.

How A Modern Priest Looks at His Outdated Church informs my writing.

Kavanaugh states that he ‘will protest with words that are written in the memory of the senseless suffering I have known and seen’ and that is the spirit in which much of my writing is done. My collection Not So You’d Notice includes such protest stories as The Antipodal Point of Fear (gun violence), Bluebird (bullying), Thought it was Enough (homelessness), and Owning Scars (generational abuse). My newest collection which I am currently sending to agents includes protest stories primarily against the cruelty and dehumanizing behavior of the current administration. And finally, my novel-in-progress is a protest against the current push to eliminate empathy and kindness from our daily lives.

I found many worthwhile nuggets of thought in Kavanaugh’s argument which are pertinent to the research and writing I am doing. I can use both sides of his presentation as models for character development and for creating a sense of place in which my protagonist struggles. Beyond that, the work stands alone as a worthwhile read and a booster shot to support his suggestion that ‘I prize the uniqueness that is mine.’

In a Human Voice, Carol Gilligan

In a Human Voice, Carol Gilligan, 2023.

In a Human Voice is a follow-up to Gilligan’s 1982 book In a Different Voice: Psychological Theory and Women’s Development, after she challenged her own use of the word ‘different’ to explain the “feminine” voice she heard when considering moral development. Here, she redefines the different voice as a human voice, or an ethic of care. After reviewing her original studies for In a Different Voice, discussing how boys and girls are initiated into patriarchy, Gilligan goes on to suggest that “relational capacities such as empathy and emotional intelligence…are recognized for what they are: human strengths” in care ethics. This is an incredible read and a powerful antidote to the dominant view circulating about how strength is the ability to use force and take whatever you want from whoever you want. Gilligan’s writing is clear and well supported, incredibly descriptive concerning child development, and most importantly, hopeful in the quest for a more decent society.

How In a Human Voice informs my writing.

Voice is central to Gilligan’s text and of special interest to me is how voices are silenced. I have explored silence in much of my writing. I have an unpublished short story called Let There Be Silence where the protagonist spends years attempting to leave his/her abuser and desires above all to be free from the oppression of another’s harmful words. In another, Bluebird, a school bus driver bullied throughout her childhood escapes into silence to escape her memories and her own hated voice. Bluebird is available online at the journal Twelve Winters who first published it and in my short story collection Not So You’d Notice available at Amazon.

Resistance is another important element in this text, primarily in children’s potential resistance to the masculine and feminine roles dictated by a patriarchal society. Gilligan suggests that most human beings do not resist these roles, hence its ongoing repetition, but that it is possible and necessary in order to realize our human capacity for care. I address this resistance in The Arc of His Sword, available in the same story collection. In this story, a young girl’s father attempts to break the generational abusive childrearing he grew up with by building a more nurturing and understanding parent-child relationship with his daughter. I developed the character in order to explore the possibility of challenging traditional roles and Gilligan’s text would have been perfect to better understand this process.

I will use In a Human Voice a great deal as I further develop my characters in my ongoing novel project. The idea of a silenced voice and possible resistance are central to the novel. I envision my main character resisting with the help of others who have been resisting and the information I have gleamed from Gilligan’s book will be invaluable.

Reading List June 2026: Part 2

For Your Own Good: The Roots of Violence in Childrearing, Alice Miller, translated by Hildegarde & Hunter Hannum, 1983. Though published in the early eighties and based on German studies and data, Millers discussion and theories seem incredibly relevant to current violence and childrearing in the United States. She argues that the centuries old “poisonous pedagogies,” which is any ideology which proports the correct way to raise children, and which includes mental, verbal and physical abuse, should be confronted and abolished. Basically, she suggests that there is a great deal of cruelty in parent and child relationships with the child always being the one to suffer the greatest as they are so less powerful than the parent. She explains through the concept of “unconscious repetition compulsion” that parents simply repeat the parenting they received and because they most likely suffered a cruel childhood, they continue the legacy of cruelty. The first half on the book includes a presentation of her data and her theories and the second half includes three lengthy case studies which illustrate how violence, toward oneself or others, can be understood by looking at the perpetrator’s childhood.

One aspect of her argument I appreciate is her discussion of evil and what we generally refer to as “inhuman” behavior, or as popular in the US, a problem of “mental illness.” Miller suggests that we would be better to recognize “that human being and beast do not exclude each other.” This is striking to me because we often write things off we cannot understand, vicious violence or cruelty, as evil and therefore out of our control. Only by accepting that humans are capable of incredible cruelty are we prepared to do something constructive about the problem.

How For Your Own Good: The Roots of Violence in Childrearing informs my writing.

I chose this work of nonfiction in conjunction with the research I am conducting for the novel I am writing. Specifically, I was considering the hatred and anger, and the concomitant cruelty, that individuals in the current administration and many of their supporters exhibit on a daily basis. I wondered what experiences they may have suffered to leave them with such anger. I ran across this book and thought it might help me answer this question. Miller addresses the issue directly and the information is helpful in creating my character studies, not just for my cruel characters but also for the characters of a more gentle nature.

Upon concluding this book I took a look back on some of my published short stories and realized I had previously dealt with the same issues, though perhaps not as directly as I could have. Specifically in my story Owning Scars, first published by The Write Launch and available at their website, but also in my collection, Not So You’d Notice available at Amazon. Unknowingly, I used the concept of repetition compulsion to present a man coming to understand and regret his cruel behavior towards his siblings, a behavior he learned from his parents and his peers. Likewise, my story Idle Hillpresents a misunderstood young man whose father utilized poisonous pedagogies (without my knowing it at the time) and finds the only solution to his unhappiness is through self-destruction. Idle Hill was first published by Synkroniciti and is available in the same story collection.

Overall, For Your Own Good stands as a great information source for creating backstory for fictional characters to help them be more believable and to explain their seemingly cruel behaviors. Beyond fiction though, it stands as a wonderful resource as I explore and tell my own story, attempt to understand why I do some of the things that I do, and come to terms with the cruelty I endured in childhood.

Reading List April 2026

·       United, Cory Booker. A memoir covering Booker’s early social and political development with a cast of inspirational activists. His focus in on responsibility towards and connection with others. While the concept of empathy is taking a bruising these days, Booker applauds it and encourages it as a mainframe of ethical living. He acknowledges the privileges and opportunities he was granted simply by being born in the right place and the right time and suggests the concept of paying it forward as a means of paying the debts accrued from receiving these gifts. While I remain a cynic as far as how effective kindness can be in today’s toxic relational climate, I support living a life based on kindness in opposition to cruelty and self-centeredness, which is a main theme throughout this book.

·      A Fan’s Notes, Frederick Exley. This novel was recommended to me by a friend and it sat on my shelf for years before I finally got around to reading it this month. It fits well alongside books by Henry Miller and Charles Bukowski. The main character, soured by life and alcoholism at an early age, splits his time between mental hospital stays and making a mess of his life and relations. Fairly routine situations albeit with a host of keen observations, my favorite being the following where the narrator is discussing the aggressors in World War II: ‘…my brother would in no time at all be in a rather ludicrous uniform of his own, with a few million other Americans called upon to pay the heavy toll for having failed to recognize insanity for the pernicious evil it is.’

·      Natural History, Carlos Fonseca, translated by Megan McDowell. Natural History is a novel with a wide cast of characters and narrative points of view. The story encompasses art and science, politics and religion and explores the theme of identity, specifically repetition, camouflage, anonymity, and the masks we wear. Three related story lines, and perhaps a few minor ones, intersect in this wonderfully complex and engaging novel.

·      White Nights, Urszula Honek, translated by Kate Webster. A short story collection out of Poland that deals with a cast of characters surrounded by and enmeshed in death. I found the subject matter and the harsh living conditions described engaging, as well as the plight of the characters as they searched for a reason to go on living and a way out of their dismal environment. The best story in the collection is Hanna where the main character, in explaining the behavior of those around her, states “they’re not consumed by sorrow in a single moment, but throughout their lives…” Through somber and bleak prose these stories speak to the difficulty in rising above stark surroundings and fighting against ever-present brutality.

·      Surrender, Brian O’Hare. A collection of short stories with the Marines and soldiers at war as the backdrop for O’Hare’s exploration of what defines a man in America. A nice addition to my research into gentleness, the recurring cast of characters in these stories struggle with generational definitions of masculinity as they forge their own paths and make similar, sometimes unique mistakes of their own. Well worth reading while Trump and Hegseth push an aggressive war in Iran along with their ‘macho’ posing.

·      The Power of Words, Simone Weil, translated by Richard Rees and Arthur Wills. A powerful set of philosophical essays addressing the emptiness of words in social and political discourse. She suggests ways around this problem presenting what she finds are the ethics which should be guiding our lives. Incredibly topical arguments considering how the current administration hurls empty words and phrases at us (except for the inherent cruelty which lies behind those words and phrases).

Reading List March 2026

·      The Natural Order of Things, Antonio Lobo Antunes, translated by Richard Zenith. Another great stream of consciousness novel from Antunes, this time about two families falling apart in a crumbling Portugal. I love the labyrinth Antunes builds with his prose, how the confused relation between the characters slowly unfolds, and how we rapidly jump between the thoughts of different characters. Always a challenge but always rewarding.

·      Buddha, Socrates, and Us: Ethical Living in Uncertain Times, Stephen Batchelor. An interesting nonfiction book that explores the similarities and differences in the teachings of Buddha and Socrates. Well thought out explanations and investigations addressing how the teachings of the two men could aid us in living an ethical life. Considering how radically uncertain things are today I’m not sure I left with any immediate steps I could take in that direction, but still, good to be reacquainted with their line of thinking.

·      The Sanity Inspectors, Friedrich Deich, translated by Robert Kee. I thoroughly enjoyed this novel published by Boiler House Press. Sinclair McKay asks in his introduction ‘When an entire society is in the grip of a murderous set of beliefs, how might individuals retain their own moral foundations?’ He was setting up the background for The Sanity Inspectors but it is a question I ask myself on a regular basis about current affairs. And it is the question the protagonist Robert Vossmenge, a German air force psychiatrist in the 30’s and 40’s, struggles with throughout the story. Along the way Vossmenge debates the line between sanity and insanity, the need for compassion to understand others, and the role one should take in opposing oppressive and violent regimes. Truly an illuminating discussion.

·      The Pedagogy of the Oppressed, Paulo Freire, translated by Myra Bergman Ramos. The first time I read this book was while getting my undergraduate degree, the second during my years of my master’s degree, and the third this month. A good book to return to often to understand oppression and the role of education in freeing oppressed people. Pertinent today as much as when it was written in the 60’s, it’s like Freire is directly addressing the growing American Oligarchy and the oppressive administration. Great reading!

·      A Philosophy of Walking, Frédéric Gros, translated by John Howe. I took this book with me on my week-long walk on Germany’s Rennstieg and read it when I was not walking the trail. It is a great accompaniment to a week of slow hiking on a fantastic trail. Because my wife and I were not feeling well we dramatically slowed down our hiking pace and walked some distance apart. I felt exactly what Gros was talking about in his book: feeling embraced by the environment, escaping my identity, clearing my mind, and having nothing to do but put one foot in front of the other. Gros discusses prominent philosophers who incorporated walking into their daily routines along with accompanying thoughts about his own wanderings and a general history of walking. This is a very interesting read with plenty of insightful comments about the idea of walking and what it means to slow down and rebel against speed.

·      On Kindness, Adam Phillips and Barbara Taylor. Through historical, philosophical and psychoanalytic investigations Phillips and Taylor offer answers to the question why kindness seems so dangerous. They support the view that contemporary society drives out the natural kindness of children and that kindness is now seen as a weakness. A good primer on kindness

·      Wanderlust: A History of Walking, Rebecca Solnit. This was a nice companion read alongside Gros’ book while walking the Rennsteig. Unlike Gros’ focus on long distance walking, Solnit’s is an exhaustive history of walking, from walking in gardens and cities, to pilgrimages and marches. The guiding message of these essays is that walking ‘is a state in which the mind, the body, and the world are aligned.’ But Solnit also gives fair amount of time to the increasing lack of walking in today’s society due in large part to ‘automobilization and suburbanization.’ Not quite as intriguing as Gros’ book but still worth the read.

Reading List November 2025

·      A Different Kind of Power, Jacinda Ardern. One of several books I am reading to make sense of the lack of gentleness in our world and my desire to see it practiced more widely. Ardern’s memoir discusses what she would later term empathetic leadership during her years as New Zealand’s prime minister. Beautiful story about the power of kindness over brutal and caustic social and political behavior.

·      Overcome Hardness with Softness, Sam Choo. Nonfiction addressing gentleness, flexibility, and calm thought as a kind of strength. More of an overview of this approach than an in-depth analysis but nicely written with encouraging thoughts about the viability of gentleness.

·      Power of Gentleness: Meditations on the Risk of Living, Anne Dufourmantelle, translated by Katherine Payne & Vincent Sallé. Dufourmantelle was a philosopher and psychoanalyst and provided an incredible account of gentleness in this brief text. She cogently discusses the power of gentleness and what a risk it is to live a gentle life: a risk she argues is worth taking. I will return to this amazing work sometime soon.

·      The Man of Feeling, Henry Mackenzie. I chose this book to understand how the author characterized gentleness. Written in the 18th century the story presents the protagonist’s gentleness as a virtue as opposed to the common view of gentleness as a weakness. Overall a decent story of one man’s life spent fiercely clinging to his empathetic approach towards others.

·      The Last Novel, David Markson. The conclusion to the trilogy includes more author notes and reminisces about artists and the creative process. A greater focus on death this time as the Novelist approaches his own. An enjoyable and challenging trilogy.

·      Soft Power, Joseph S Nye. Non-fiction explaining the role soft power plays in successful world politics, with emphasis on the United States. Written in 2004 so the data is outdated and much has changed in the world since then. Still, a useful text in my exploration of gentleness.

·      Good and Evil and Other Stories, Samanta Schweblin, translated by Megan McDowell. I could read Schweblin stories all day long. This collection explores the things we lose during our lifetimes, from our voices, to loved ones, to valuable relationships. In the end, the characters are left to themselves to understand their losses. Quite supreme!

·      Flesh, David Szalay. Novel which just won the Booker Prize, I read it to see how Szalay presented the male voice, something many critics discussed. Another story of a man’s life, this time growing up in Hungary, emigrating to London, and finally returning to Hungary. The protagonist has very little to say so we learn about him from the situations he falls into, his successes and his failures. One of the main characters says about the protagonist Istvan he “represents a primitive form of masculinity” which I found to be an apt description of the character throughout the text.

Reading List October 2025

·      The Unworthy, Agustina Bazterrica, translated by Sarah Moses. Another incredible novel from the author of Tender is the Flesh, one of my favorite reads of 2020. This time the story takes place in a dystopian convent ruled over by a cruel male leader and an equally cruel Superior Sister. It is a brutal hierarchical world of women with plenty of abuse at all levels. Great story exploring misogyny, faith, and masochism. Scary how it mirrors our current world.

·      Babel, Gabriel Blackwell. A short story collection attempting to unravel the confusion we experience when we confront ourselves and those around us. Some interesting characters and situations but lacking as a whole.

·      The Return, Roberto Bolaño, translated by Chris Andrews and Natasha Wimmer. Another incredible short story collection from Bolaño. This time along with his regular themes there is a greater focus on death. Wonderful stories!

·      Fahrenheit 451, Ray Bradbury. A classic novel and a pleasure to reread as part of my research on book banning for a series of short stories I am working on. Should be required reading for the folks working so tirelessly banning books these days.

·      Perfection, Vincenzo Latronico, translated by Sophie Hughes. Story of an expat couple living their 20’s through 40’s as web designers. They make sense of their lives and attempt to find meaning by procuring the ‘right’ consumer goods only to discover how empty their lives are after an adulthood spent emulating the digital world.

·      The Man Who Cried I Am, John A. Williams. A 1967 novel about a black writer navigating the world of politics and journalism. Wonderful study of mortality and interracial relations, including a vicious government plot to deal with racial problems.  

·      Solito, Javier Zamora. Harrowing memoir about a nine-year-old boy migrating to the USA from El Salvador, including the impressive story about the humanity showed by those who helped him on his way. The author does not include discussion about the pros and cons of migration but rather uses the platform to share the plight of those in the process. Certainly a valuable story to include in those discussions.

Reading List September 2025

·      Last Evenings on Earth, Roberto Bolaño, translated by Chris Andrews & Natasha Wimmer. The first of four Bolaño short story collections I plan on rereading. Struggling and failed writers populate these incredible stories. These are downtrodden exiled characters and there is a continual threat of violence which propels the narratives.

·      American Abductions, Mauro Javier Cárdenas. This novel from Ecuador is set in America in the near future but closely resembles the present despite its technological advancements. The novel explores the psychological and physical stress caused by the deportations of Latin Americans living and working in the USA. Frightening but intriguing experimental writing.

·      America: The Farewell Tour, Chris Hedges. Hedges nonfiction book examines what he sees as America’s decline with chapters addressing hate, work, freedom, addiction and more. Sober reading providing an interesting analysis of the main culprit, the corporate state.

·      Vanishing Point, David Markson. A continuation of Markson’s This is Not a Novel with a deeper focus on impending death. Presented as notes Author has collected on index cards mainly about the challenges of creative life. Looking forward to the final novel.

·      Death Takes Me, Christina Rivera Garza, translated by Sarah Booker & Robin Meyers. A literary crime narrative out of Mexico involving gendered violence and deeply steeped in an exploration of poetry. Incredible experimental writing.

·      Time: The Present, Tess Slesinger. Selected stories from Slesinger writing from the 1930’s. There are a handful of extremely excellent stories in this collection but overall I was impressed with Slesinger’s exploration of gender relations, worker exploitation, and race politics through her modernist style.

Reading List August 2025

·      May We Be Forgiven, A.M. Homes. An enjoyable novel exploring our inner lives and asking how we manage to survive each day and the challenges that appear. Quite fun to watch the growth of the protagonist.

·      This is Not a Novel, David Markson. A barrage of thoughts about the creative process, creative individuals, death, and including something that could be called a storyline. First in a trilogy. Looking forward to the next two.

·      Cool For America, Andrew Martin. A short story collection with lots of writers, music, booze. and drugs. Some fun along the way but grows weary with repetition.

·      Tartuffe and The Misanthrope, Molière, translated by Maya Slater. Very humorous drama pieces I read as part of research for the hypocrisy story I am currently writing.

·      To Walk Alone in the Crowd, Antonio Muñoz Molina, translated by Guillermo Bleichmar. A nice look at solitude amongst other people. Mostly containing thoughts while walking through cities, it is a cool exploration of mindfulness while exploring the world around us.

·      Oreo, Fran Ross. A great romp through seventies Philadelphia and New York while exploring race and family relations. Written in 1974 but still highly applicable.

·      Show Don’t Tell, Curtis Sittenfeld. Short stories featuring middle-aged characters mining their pasts to understand their current situations.

·      A Sensitive Person, Jachym Topol, translated by Alex Zucker. Always a pleasure to read another Topol novel from the Czech Republic. This one is a wild road novel beginning during an acting tour in Europe and then a return to Prague. Lots of absurd encounters with a cast of characters and explorations of current politics and other concerns.

Rebecca Goldstein: Incompleteness: The Proof and Paradox of Kurt Gödel

I will state right from the start that this book and Gödel’s Incompleteness Theorem are far from my full comprehension: I’m glad I read it but confess to not fully understanding most of it. I ran across the theory while reading Mircea Cartarescu’s Solenoid and was intrigued with his application of the theory and its philosophical implications. In a nutshell and in my less than mathematical thinking, I understand incompleteness to state that there are objective truths that cannot be proven within that system and that if one fails to reach an objective truth there is a fault in one’s thinking, not in the truth itself. Goldstein’s example is the statement 5 +7 = 12. If one were to add 5 and 7 and arrive at 13, one can assume there is a problem with counting and not with the statement. Clear enough, but I got lost in Chapter 3 where Goldstein lays out the proof for this. Sill, there is something inherently attractive in the theorem and in its application to daily life and it is the reason I slowly worked my way through the book.

One useful application is in evaluating the current mess of constant lies, false ‘facts,’ and the rewriting of objective truths dominant in politics and social life. Its as if we now reject the existence of objective truths in favor of anything we want to create or manufacture to justify our behaviour. People have some bizarre beliefs and opinions and create new ‘truths’ to support those beliefs and opinions, rather than the other way around. Goldstein quotes Gödel in her epigraph: “But every error is due to extraneous factors (such as emotion and education); reason itself does not err.” It seems as if reason is today’s casualty in favor of subjective truths and errors.

I may be making a mistake in trying to apply Incompleteness to daily living, and granted my understanding is tenuous, but it seems like a worthy goal. A challenging book and enlightening reading about Gödel’s life outside of mathematics, especially his relationship with Einstein. A good brain teaser.